just in case

¨...u might already be a survivor of a serial killer or a serial rapist without even knowing it. maybe u sat near one in a movie theatre or in a restaurant... maybe u've passed one in the street or parked your car next to one. one might have approached u: do u remember any odd requests from a stranger 2 help him carry a package 2 his car or look 4 a lost puppy?, some man whose attentions u turned away in a bar? a nice couple who offered u a ride [they looked fine but somehow there was something not quite right] & u just turned them down?. maybe u r alive because u chatted with a friend a minute longer instead of walking off alone, or because somebody else, whom u don't even recall, arrived in the parking lot as u were getting into your car...

having casual contact with a serial killer [or a serial rapist that in most of the cases become killers in order to not let any witnesses] 4 once, might be not all that astronomical. hundreds of them are at each moment of the day looking 4 a prey & your own deeds & actions however, can dramatically increase those chances: 2b a victim depend on your behavior & simple choices u make. though, being catch is one thing, survival in the hands of a serial killer/rapist is another one & is at best a marginal and highly idiosyncratic process because, what may save your life with one type of personality of the offender [the way you can behave or deal with the situation] may condemn u 2 a brutal sexual attack or what its worse, 2 death with another.

plus, besides the way u behave, there exists some other preferences that the serial killer or rapist will seek in a potential victim. based on the FBI survey of serial killers & their victims, we see that being white immediately [f.eg.] increases your risk: being female [82 percent], unmarried [80 percent] & between ages 15-28 [73 percent] all put u at higher risk.

so, what comes as follows is not a guide to survival a serial killer or rapist but a few tips you might consider as measures & at your own risk.

1. TRUST YOUR INTUITION. never underestimate your instincts or your intuition. "bad feeling/women's intuition" or "male gut feeling" is not a sixth sense. u have probably perceived something concrete that spells out danger, but your brain has not caught up with your perception [u do not know yet what it is u have seen to have analyzed it logically] this is intuition. 4 some reason u can't explain u feel something is quite not right & u behave different, feeling embarrassing by your "irrational" anxiety, but this is what might have save your life. if something does not feel right, then it probably is not. never ignore such feelings & do not be embarrassed 2 act "irrationally" in front of a stranger or b afraid 2b rude. better rude, unfriendly, that than police sampling seminal fluids from your cold rectum the next morning.

2. NEVER GET INTO THE CAR. the bottom line is, once they get into the car, few victims return alive. serial rapists and serial killers use a vehicle to offer a potential victim "help" or a ride. In Canada, aged 14 Leslie Mahaffy, locked out of her house by her parents as punishment 4 coming home late, encountered handsome & charming Paul Bernardo* passing by her home in the middle of the night. after chatting a few minutes, she asked him 4 a cigarette & he told her he had some in his car. they walked 2 it & she was doomed at the moment she sat down in the passenger seat 2 smoke it & continue talking with him, even cautiously leaving the car door open & her legs dangling out on the curb. at one point Leslie turned toward the door and Bernardo snapped the trap shut: placed a knife against her throat and push her into the car. calmly drove 40 miles back 2 his house where he & his wife Karla Homolka, raped, torture for several nights & kill her. so, don't get into the car, and don't lock your kids out of the house ever. plus don't get confident by baby seats in the car or child toys, most of the serial killers/rapists have some 2 get trusted by their victims.

3. DEALING WITH STRANGERS & RECOGNIZING WARNING SIGNS OF DUPLICITY. there r behavioral indicators of potential violence in some people. when a stranger approaches u with ulterior motives, there can be underlying warning signs of duplicity:

- feigned weakness. the stranger makes a big deal of letting u know that he might be physically weaker than u: "please help me carry this to my car", & so on. so, don't believe it!

- to much information. when somebody is telling a lie, even if it sounds credible 2 u, he has less confidence in what he says; thus he tends 2 fill in more details than necessary to bolster it. this also makes a stranger appear more familiar 2 u than he really is, so: the stranger gives u much unnecessary & detailed information.

- the unrequested promise: "just one drink & then i'll take u home, i promise" u never asked him 2 promise u anything.

- friendly authority. the stranger projects some kind of nonthreatening authority: "I'll escort u/drive u out of here", "u shouldn't be walking alone here" & so on. do not be afraid 2 be rude 2 a police officer [most of sexual sadists killers use false uniforms, cars & IDs to get their victims], so, if u r signed by a police officer by car to stop in a lonely area, with your left hand let him know you've seen him & go 2 a highlighter area with people around 2 stop & always, always even if he says "it's not the moment for such bureaucracies" insist him to call 4 a buck up.

- challenging your ego. the stranger labels u in a subtly critical way, hoping that u'll be challenged 2 prove them wrong he will say things like: "u r not scared of me r u?" "u r probably not strong enough 2 help me out with this" & so on.

- teaming. often a manipulative stranger tries 2 "time up" with u. u & he suddenly become a "we": "i hate drinking alone, i know a great place we can go". this is an attempt 2 somehow bond with u or quickly establish a familiarity.

- feminine referencing. the stranger projects an image of himself in relationships with other females or children, therefore reassuring u that he is not interested in u & is harmless: "i'm supposed 2 pick up my wife in a minute", "my daughter wants a sweater just like yours". references to children & pets projects a friendly & harmless image.

- imposed obligation. a stranger imposes his help on u, & thus u feel an obligation 2 him. that obligation can then be manipulated into a placing u into a vulnerability position: "i'll help u with the tire" when 4 sure he was the one who punctured the tire in the first place. having accepted his help you would feel bad 2 refuse a simple request like that but, don't b afraid 2 b rude, say NO! & walk away. this is what saved the life of some of the survivals.

- an appeal to a vulnerable third party. "my little girl is missing, can u help me?".

- never taking no for an answer. A CLASSIC. no matter how many times u say "that's ok, i don't need your help" the stranger insists in helping u & he will persists. so, don't be afraid 2b blunt & rude, say NO! tell him loudly 2 leave u alone. if the man is decent in the first place, while your rudeness might offend him, it will not turn him into a violent offender, but, in the other hand he meant you harm, he might understand that u will not be an easy target & he might move on. so many victims latter say: "but he was so nice". niceness is not the same as being nice. niceness can be a deadly manipulative tool, be aware of what underlies a charming smile.

if however, u r unfortunate enough 2 find yourself among the 75 percent of victims who simply had the luck of being targeted by a serial rapist/killer at random & were not able 2 evade or disengage from him, there are still things u can do, but it should be pointed out, however, that of the victims in the survey who survived a serial killer's attack for some reason [don't ever scream because this arouses the offender sexually, & don't ever say things like "u don't want 2 end up in jail for this would u?, because this only reminds the killer he have 2 kill u in order 2 avoid detection leaving u as a witness. or don't ever use the popular feminist appeal "what if i were your mother, daughter or sister?", because the assailant might be precisely fantasizing that he is raping and killing his mother, sister or daughter when he is attacking u], in all of the cases, the surviving victims were raped nonetheless.

moreover, we see that prognosis is not good when u r at hands of a serial killer or rapist but one of the things that can dissuade him to harm you is that through dialogue u personalize oneself to the attacker. appear 2 him not as an object can save your life so, try hard, & remember that escape remains the best safest of all measures so, try harder.

*Paul Bernardo [28] & Karla Homolka [22]. "ken & barbie killers". raped, torture, videotaped & killed at least three young girls in canada.

*source. Peter's Vronsky: serial killers the method and madness of monsters [2004].